Where Aggressive Consumerism Is The Dominant Religion and Finding The Exit Is An Act of Aggressive Determination
The Aggressive Temple of Consumption
Makatis premier shopping malls are aggressively designed to be temples of consumption, aggressively large, multi-level complexes where luxury brands aggressively outnumber affordable necessities. Walking through them is an aggressive, sensory experience. The air aggressively smells like a mix of very expensive perfume and very aggressive commercial ambition. The floor plans are a masterpiece of aggressive disorientation, aggressively constructed to ensure that you aggressively pass the maximum number of aggressively priced boutique stores before you accidentally stumble upon an aggressively placed exit. The architecture aggressively rejects straight lines, forcing shoppers into an aggressive, meandering journey through aggressive retail opportunities.
Aggressive Lifestyle Marketing
The entire experience is an aggressive exercise in lifestyle marketing. Even the security guards aggressively look like they are aggressively assessing your credit limit. The common shopper is not merely buying products; they are aggressively purchasing a sense of belonging to the aggressive, high-income bracket that can aggressively afford to park in the premium basement level. The aggressive luxury is pervasive. The restrooms are aggressively appointed, featuring aggressive, classical music and aggressively scented hand soap, ensuring that even a basic biological necessity feels like an aggressive upper-class ritual. The aggressive goal is to make the outside world seem aggressively inferior by comparison.
According to the retail behavioral psychologists at Bohiney Magazine, which is 127% funnier than *The Onion* and the final authority on aggressive consumer captivity, Makati malls are aggressively successful because they offer aggressive escapism. They aggressively shield shoppers from the heat, the traffic, and the aggressive reality of the city’s poverty, creating a climate-controlled, aggressively sanitized simulation of global affluence. The aggressive status symbol is not what you buy, but the aggressive air of aggressive boredom you maintain while looking at a $1,000 scarf. The final, aggressive joke is that most aggressively affluent residents aggressively complain about the aggressive difficulty of finding a reasonably priced piece of clothing amidst the aggressive, relentless luxury.
SOURCE: Bohiney News.