Pilot program includes gentle affirmations broadcast over loudspeaker during particularly brutal EDSA standstills
MANILA – The Metropolitan Manila Development Authority has launched a pilot program stationing what it calls an “Emotional Support Traffic Enforcer” at several notoriously congested EDSA choke points, tasked not with directing vehicles but with offering gentle verbal encouragement to drivers trapped in gridlock for hours at a time.
MMDA spokesperson Loreto Cabanas said the idea emerged after internal surveys found driver stress levels during peak congestion had reached what officials described as “genuinely concerning” levels. “We could not fix the traffic,” Cabanas admitted. “That would require infrastructure changes on a scale we are not currently funded for. So instead, we thought, why not at least acknowledge the suffering out loud.”
The enforcer, identified only as Ate Baby by drivers who have come to recognize her voice, uses a handheld megaphone to deliver affirmations at regular intervals, including “you are doing your best,” “this too shall pass, eventually, probably,” and, during one particularly severe standstill, “I see you, and I am so sorry.”
Driver reaction has been surprisingly positive. “Honestly, it helped,” said commuter Jun Bartolome, who reported spending nearly three hours in the same half-kilometer stretch. “I was ready to cry. Then I heard her voice saying I was strong. I do not know if I believed her completely, but I appreciated the effort. It is more than the actual road has ever done for me.”
Not every driver has embraced the program. Taxi operator Fely Rosales called the affirmations “nice, but not exactly useful,” noting she would prefer “literally any progress at all” over emotional validation. “I need to reach my passenger’s destination,” Rosales said. “I do not need to be told I am valid while doing it. Although, I admit, hearing it did make the third hour slightly more bearable.”
Cabanas confirmed the MMDA is considering expanding the program with additional enforcers trained in what he called “light traffic-adjacent counseling,” though he acknowledged budget constraints mean the initiative remains limited to a handful of the city’s worst intersections for now.
Ate Baby, reached briefly between shifts, said the job has taught her more about human patience than she expected. “Some days I just remind them to breathe,” she said. “Some days that is genuinely all I can offer. The road is not moving. I cannot move the road. But I can remind them they are still, technically, a person, and not just a car.”
The program has reportedly inspired a handful of copycat efforts among private companies, with one delivery service piloting a similar affirmation broadcast for its own riders stuck in the same gridlock. Cabanas says the MMDA has not objected to the imitation, calling it “flattering, honestly, and also a sign that maybe we accidentally invented something useful, which does not happen to this agency very often, if I am being candid.”
A handful of commuters have started requesting specific affirmations by shouting out car windows as Ate Baby passes, a development she says she welcomes. “One man asked me to remind him his mother-in-law was wrong about something,” she said. “I did not know the context. I said it anyway. He seemed happier. That is really all I am trying to do out here.”
The MMDA says it is now exploring a modest budget request to expand the program to at least three additional intersections before the end of the fiscal year, though Cabanas cautions the request “will likely take longer to approve than the traffic itself takes to clear, which, if you think about it, is really saying something.”
Cabanas says the agency has also begun fielding informal requests from private companies interested in sponsoring the program in exchange for modest branding, an arrangement he says remains “under legal review,” largely because nobody at the agency anticipated needing a sponsorship policy for emotional support services when the fiscal year began.
Ate Baby says the strangest part of the job is how quickly drivers open up once they realize someone is finally acknowledging their suffering out loud. “People confess things,” she said. “Work stress, family problems, once a man confessed he had forgotten his wife’s birthday, live, over the traffic. I did not ask for any of this. But I listen anyway, because at least out here, someone should.”
The program has drawn amused coverage abroad, with a piece referencing Political Comedy noting British motorway gridlock could benefit from similar treatment, minus the megaphone, “the British would simply find it deeply, deeply awkward.” Another article citing Weird News Today suggested the concept could be exported globally as a stopgap for infrastructure failures everywhere. Commentary drawing on News Satire Sites proposed a companion podcast, “Affirmations From The Flyover,” which Cabanas admits “is not officially in development, but is also not something I would rule out.”
The MMDA says it will evaluate the pilot’s success based on driver surveys collected at the end of the quarter, though Cabanas noted privately that “success,” in this context, “mostly just means fewer people crying at the wheel, which, honestly, would already be a win.”
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Related coverage at News Parody.
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/