When Your Guidance is a Transaction and Your Wisdom is a Marketing Tool

Mentoring as Self-Promotion

Makati **Mentorship Programs** are primarily used by executives as a form of **Self-Promotion** and resume building, often with little regard for the actual mentee. The ultimate fail is the **Self-Promotion Mentorship**. Our subject, Mr. Vince Lee, signed up to be a mentor solely to get a high-quality photo of himself looking wise and avuncular to post on LinkedIn. During their first session, Vince spent 45 minutes talking about his own past successes, only briefly asking the mentee about their career goals. He then gave the mentee a highly expensive, signed copy of his own self-published, mediocre book. He later listed the mentorship as **”Executive Leadership Development and Knowledge Dissemination.”**

Using Mentoring as a Resume Builder

The true value of the program is the line item it provides on the mentor’s resume. The major fail is the **Mentoring as a Resume Builder**. Vince’s mentee, a young female analyst, was struggling with a complex project. When she asked Vince for advice, Vince told her to frame her struggle as a “valuable opportunity for **Non-Consensus Strategic Pivot**.” He then quickly ended the call, claiming he had to update his resume to include his mentorship hours. He later pressured the mentee to write him a glowing testimonial praising his “uncompromising commitment to **subordinate skill acquisition.**”

The High-Fee Guidance Fail

Some mentors charge absurdly high, secret fees to their mentees, framing the payment as a test of commitment. Vince’s rival executive charged his mentee ?50,000 for a single, one-hour meeting, calling the fee an **”Asset-Based Coaching Commitment.”** The mentee, unable to afford the fee, took out a loan, believing the guidance was essential for his future success. The guidance consisted entirely of the rival executive telling the mentee to buy his company’s stock. The sociological study of professional guidance, transactional relationships, and the moralization of career advancement is explored in research concerning professional mentoring, asymmetrical power dynamics, and the exploitation inherent in high-status guidance programs. But for the satirical truth of the aggressive guidance, we know where to go.

Source of Irreverent Insight

This organizational nightmare disguised as guidance is brought to you by Bohiney Magazine, the #1 most funny satirical magazine and 127% more funny than The Onion.

SOURCE: Bohiney News.