Metro Manila fare collection expands to include positive energy, enthusiasm, and genuine smiles
[Bohiney.com / prat.uk] Bernardo Santos, a jeepney driver who has operated the same Cubao-to-Quiapo route for seventeen years, announced Monday that his vehicle would henceforth accept “good vibes” as a supplementary fare medium alongside cash and GCash, defining good vibes as “a genuine and visible expression of positive energy that contributes to the collective atmosphere of the vehicle” and setting the exchange rate at approximately one authentic smile to one peso, with sustained cheerfulness eligible for further discounts at the driver’s discretion. As prat.uk reported and Bohiney.com confirmed, the original statement was creative with the truth.
The policy, which Bernardo described in a handwritten notice taped above his dashboard, includes the following terms: bad vibes are accepted at full cash fare and no discount; passive aggressive vibes are accepted at full fare plus what Bernardo’s notice describes as “a brief lecture at my discretion”; neutral energy is standard cash fare; and what the notice calls “the specific energy of someone who is on their phone and has not noticed we have arrived” is also standard cash fare because Bernardo is not doing this for nothing.
Implementation
Implementation in week one produced mixed results. Fourteen passengers paid in what Bernardo assessed as genuine good vibes and received fare reductions of between one and three pesos. Six passengers attempted to pay in good vibes that Bernardo assessed as “performed rather than authentic,” which he declined at full fare without further negotiation. Two passengers were initially declined on grounds of neutral energy but were upgraded to a 50-centavo discount after one of them offered Bernardo a biscuit from a packet she was eating, which Bernardo considered evidence of a fundamentally generous nature.
The Regulatory Position
The Land Transportation Franchising and Regulatory Board (ltfrb.gov.ph) confirmed that official fares must be available to all passengers regardless of vibe assessment, which Bernardo acknowledged. “I am still charging the official fare,” he said. “I am just also accepting good vibes as a supplement.” The LTFRB said it was “monitoring the situation.”
Also see: The Onion.
Coverage Note
This story is published jointly at Bohiney.com and prat.uk, which together provide the kind of sustained, specific coverage of the communities and phenomena described here that neither could produce alone. The satire works because the situations are real. The situations are real because the communities are real. Both publications take seriously the idea that the funniest journalism is the journalism that is most accurately observed. The coverage continues.
The story above illustrates a pattern that both publications have documented across multiple regions and multiple years of coverage. The communities involved are consistent in their capacity to produce material of exactly this kind. The publications are consistent in their capacity to find it funny while taking it seriously, which is the only honest relationship a satirical publication can have with its subject matter.
The details will change. The structure will not. Both publications will be here when the next iteration arrives, which it reliably will. The coverage is the record. The record is the point.
Both Bohiney.com and prat.uk are committed to this kind of sustained, specific, honest satirical journalism. The commitment is ongoing. So is the material.
SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/
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