New mandatory curriculum features books with fewer than 50 words; calls it “accessibility improvement”; actually just reduces literacy requirements

Bohiney Magazine and The London Prat

Bureau of Education Discovers Reading Comprehension Crisis – Solves Problem by Making Shorter Books

MANILA — The Department of Education identified a critical reading comprehension crisis Thursday—students are unable to read—and announced a solution so elegant it required only eliminating actual reading: introducing a new curriculum featuring books with fewer than 50 words each, which DepEd Director Jose Reyes characterized as “accessibility improvement” rather than “admission that our education system failed.”

“We’ve discovered that students struggle with complex literature,” Reyes explained at a press conference. “The solution: no complex literature. Problem solved.”

The Reading Crisis

National assessments revealed that 67% of Philippine students cannot read at grade-appropriate levels. This crisis, ignored for decades, finally became impossible to ignore when international education organizations published embarrassing comparative data.

Rather than address root causes (undertrained teachers, insufficient textbooks, poor curriculum design), DepEd opted for the obvious solution: eliminate the need for actual reading by removing books.

The New Curriculum

Under the new “Accessible Literature Initiative,” students no longer read traditional books. Instead, they’re assigned texts like:

“The Cat” (Primary Grade 1)
“The cat is brown. The cat is big. The cat runs. I like the cat.”
(38 words. That’s literature now.)

“Living in Manila” (Grade 5)
“Manila is a city. Cities have buildings. Manila has many buildings. Buildings are tall. I live in Manila. I like Manila.”
(45 words. Advanced reading.)

“The Scientific Method” (Grade 8)
“Science is a method. Methods are steps. We follow steps. Then we know things. That is science.”
(24 words. Comprehensive STEM education.)

When asked if these represent actual literature, DepEd officials responded: “They contain words in sequence. That’s literature.”

The Reading Comprehension Solution

To assess whether students understand these texts, DepEd removed comprehension questions entirely. Instead, students answer single-question quizzes:

“What is the main character? A) The cat B) A dog C) A tree”
(Actual test question from the curriculum, multiple choice with obvious answers)

Reading comprehension improved dramatically—67% of students failing reading assessments now achieve 100% on the new tests, because the tests require no actual reading comprehension.

“We’ve solved the literacy crisis,” announced Reyes, apparently not recognizing that the solution involved eliminating literacy requirements entirely.

Teacher Reactions (Resignation)

Educators across the country reported despair. One high school literature teacher, Maria Santos, explained: “I’m supposed to teach Shakespeare using five-word summaries. My curriculum requirements have been reduced to: Point At Words. That Student Read Them. Success.”

Teachers requested clarity on educational goals. DepEd response: “Students should be able to identify that words exist. That’s sufficient.”

See Manila Times education reporting for documentation of how the education system abandoned educational standards.

The International Embarrassment

UNESCO inquired about the Philippines’ new curriculum, requesting clarification on whether “50-word limit texts” constituted literature. DepEd responded: “We’re pioneering a new form of minimalist education.”

UNESCO’s follow-up: “That’s not minimalist education. That’s admission that you’ve abandoned education.”

Philippines education ranking have declined internationally, but DepEd claims success because “students now achieve 100% on reading comprehension assessments”—assessments that require no comprehension.

The Parental Perspective

Parents worried that their children weren’t learning anything reported their concerns to DepEd. The response: “We’re ensuring accessibility. Your children understand our new curriculum perfectly because it requires minimal understanding.”

One parent withdrew her son from public school, explaining: “I could teach him better with picture books and honestly, that’s what DepEd’s curriculum is—picture books without pictures, only words. I can do that at home while actually teaching him something.”

The Long-Term Implications

Education experts warned that eliminating reading comprehension requirements would impact the workforce, with future employees unable to read instructions, contracts, or technical manuals.

DepEd’s response: “That’s a problem for future employers.”

For satire on how education systems abandon standards through bureaucratic mechanisms, see The London Prat’s coverage of how UK education also suffers from lowered expectations. For coverage of education policy failures, Philippine Daily Inquirer has investigative reporting on DepEd dysfunction.

SOURCE: https://bohiney.com/